Dying to be Perfect

Do you ever stay up all night just thinking? Not being able to sleep, just letting thoughts wander through your head? Then you know how it feels to have your brain constantly tell you that one thing, and not being able to let go of it. Whether the thoughts you are stuck on are about a conversation that you didn't handle the way you wanted to, a crush that you have, or simply life, they are all equally consuming your time. Recently I have been stuck on the thought of being perfect. How do you live up to everyone's expectations? It is a very difficult subject due to the fact that if you talk about it being difficult in life, you are no longer "perfect". As a teenage girl, especially, it is truly nerve-wracking how much you need to adjust to fit a form of perfection. People constantly tell you to not reveal too much skin, don't be prude, don't swear, don't be a goody-goody, etc. and I understand that some of it has to do with values and different cultures, but as kids, we are brought up by being told contradictory things. Society is never satisfied with how you present yourself, and it puts a lot of pressure on most people. Ways to decrease this anxiety about the pressure are to strengthen your confidence, accept that making mistakes is okay, and asking for help.Anxiety about pressure is often built upon the fact that you are currently not satisfied with yourself. When you put yourself down a lot, it is much easier to gather all pressure and feel responsible to live up to expectations, because you constantly tell yourself you need to be 'good enough'. A way to boost your confidence is the typical, ridiculous trick to give yourself a motivating speech in the mirror for five minutes. Although I haven't tried this, it seems fascinating. Another method would be to think positive, and stop comparing yourself to others. This is easier said than done obviously because we are always looking at beautiful people all over social media and in real life, but if you are comparing yourself to someone, point out good things about you in the process as well. Last way to boost confidence is to be selfless and help people. If you are helpful and are a good person, it will be easier to like yourself. Overall, boosting your confidence can also decrease your stress rate. Accepting failure as an option has always been an issue for me and I know it is for a lot of my friends as well. This is due to the fact that we are constantly told of consequences that happen if you fail at something such as, detention, losing at something, or weakened resume. Obviously it is not ideal to fail regularly, but it is normal to fail at something every now and then. When I did horseback riding I was always afraid to fall off the horse until one day, at a competition, I fell and landed straight on my butt. It was painful at the time, but after that, I came over my fear of falling of the horse and became stronger as a horseback rider. This means that sometimes failure teaches you more than being successful would. In conclusion, failure is not always a horrible feature in life, it can sometimes be helpful.Asking for help is a huge struggle all around the world. Many people feel the need to be quiet if they need help because they are ashamed, think nobody cares, or don't have anyone to ask for help from. It is important to be able to have someone to talk to even if you are ashamed or think nobody cares because if you don't it could get worse. I have had experiences when I keep my feelings or stress inside instead of sharing it to a trusted person to relieve myself, and somehow I always wonder what would have gone differently. I recently learned that its okay to let people know you have problems because they most likely have some way of helping whether it's emotional support or leading you to the correct sources. I know it is frightening to open up, especially if you are used to being viewed as someone who is energetic, never complains, or that doesn't talk. It is just really hard in general to share feelings, but after you have opened up, it will be much more relieving than you think. Overall, the stress that winds you up, and the pressure from school, work, etc. can be stressed. Although sometimes it feels as if the whole world revolves around that, it is not that big of a deal if you mess something up. Take life as it comes, and handle obstacles on the way. Don't think about what you are doing wrong, think about what you are doing right. We need society to change the way it views perfection and how others put pressure on themselves to fit the ideal. It is our job to try to turn the society around by spreading love and care to people from everywhere.